How to Say “Please” in English: 20+ Polite Requests

The short answer

In English, the most direct equivalent of “kérem” is please (/pliːz/), and it usually goes at the very end of the sentence: “Could you open the door, please?” Not at the beginning, which can feel natural in Hungarian. This is one of the first differences worth learning.

But “please” is only the tip of the iceberg. The real toolkit of English politeness is modal verbs. Where you might say “Kérem, nyissa ki az ablakot,” a native English speaker will say: “Could you open the window?” This is already polite even without please. The verb choice carries the politeness.

English is the native or second language of about 1.5 billion people, according to Ethnologue 2024, and you can feel differences in politeness levels between British, American, and Australian English. British speakers usually prefer more indirect request forms, Americans are more direct, and Australians are more relaxed. This guide shows 20 key request forms, sorted by formality level, with pronunciation, examples, and cultural context.

"In English, politeness is not tied to a single word, adding 'please' matters less than using the right verb form and the right kind of indirect wording."

(Peter Trudgill and Jean Hannah, International English, Routledge, 2008)

Quick overview

Where “please” goes in the sentence

One of the most common mistakes Hungarian native speakers make is putting “please” at the start of the sentence, because that feels natural with “kérem” or “légy szíves.” In English, you can do it, but it creates a different effect.

At the end of the sentence, natural, polite, neutral:

• “A coffee, please.” (I’d like a coffee.)
• “Could you close the door, please?” (Could you close the door, please?)
• “Pass the salt, please.” (Pass the salt, please.)

At the beginning of the sentence, acceptable, but firmer, sometimes more urgent:

• “Please be quiet.” (Please be quiet.) This can sound a bit like an order.
• “Please don't do that.” (Please don't do that.)
• “Please, I really need your help.” (Please, I really need your help.) This has a pleading tone.

Why does it feel more natural at the end? British politeness research, especially Penelope Brown and Stephen Levinson’s Politeness: Some Universals in Language Usage (1978), suggests that request markers at the start of a sentence signal directives, while “please” at the end softens the request and threatens the listener’s autonomy less. In short, at the end it feels like an “add-on,” at the start it feels more like an “instruction.”

Request levels by rank

English requests have four main levels, sorted by formality.

Can you...?

This is the most direct request form. It is perfect for friends, siblings, and colleagues you know well. If you ask someone you do not know well, “Can you?” can feel pushy, so “Could you?” is safer.

It is important to know that in English, “Can you?” is not really about ability. It is a request formula. Everyone knows you are making a request, not checking physical ability.

Could you...?

“Could you?” is the basic form of polite requests in English. In English grammar, conditional or past forms create distance between the request and the listener, and that distance signals politeness. David Crystal’s The Cambridge Encyclopedia of the English Language (Cambridge University Press, 2019) notes that this pragmatic use of modal verbs is one of English’s most typical features.

If you are not sure which request form to choose, “Could you...?” is almost always appropriate.

Would you mind...?

This is one of the hardest forms for Hungarian native speakers, not because of pronunciation, but because of the answer logic. See the “Would you mind trap” section below.

Grammatically, “Would you mind + verb-ing” is the only correct structure. “Would you mind to close” is wrong. “Would you mind if I opened the window?” is also correct, and here the subject is me, not the person you ask.

I was wondering if you could...

This form almost questions whether the request even exists, you were only “wondering” about it. This is maximum British indirectness. Oxford and Cambridge students use it when they email their professor. If you get a request like this, it signals strong respect.

In restaurants and shops

It is worth learning restaurant and shop requests separately, because these are the most common real-life situations.

I'd like..., please

“I'd like” is the basic formula for restaurant English. Use it instead of the bare sentence “I want.” “I want” is not always rude, kids and very direct people use it, but with strangers and waiters, “I'd like” makes a much better impression.

Variation: “I'll have...” is also very common in the United States: “I'll have the chicken, please.” It sounds friendly and natural, though it is less standard in British English.

Could I have...?

This is a bit more direct than “I'd like,” but it is still completely polite. If you open the menu and point at a dish, “Could I have this one, please?” is natural and correct.

Can I get...?

If you live in London, learn “I'd like” and “Could I have” first, “Can I get?” can sound a bit foreign to British ears. If you visit the United States, “Can I get?” sounds completely natural in cafés and restaurants.

Asking for permission

When you do not just ask for something, but ask permission to do something, use different forms.

May I...?

“May I?” is the classic formal permission request. In British schools, teachers still correct students: “Can I go to the toilet?” → “May I go to the toilet?” In adult English, this difference often fades, but “May I” always sounds more formal.

Could I...?

“Could I?” is the most common permission request in everyday life. You hear it at work, in schools, and in hotels. “May I?” sounds more elevated, while “Could I?” balances formality and naturalness.

Is it okay if I...?

Would it be alright if...?

Getting someone’s attention

If you want to speak to a stranger, you usually need an attention-getter first.

Excuse me, could you...?

“Excuse me” opens the interaction, it signals you do not want to interrupt rudely. The “could you” that follows softens the request further. This combination is perfect for addressing strangers on the street, on public transport, or in an office.

I hate to bother you, but...

This form shows you know you are interrupting the other person. A feature of British politeness is admitting the burden in advance, which can make the request feel more polite. “I'm sorry to disturb you, but...” serves the same purpose.

The “Would you mind” trap

Summary table of request levels

According to the British Council’s 2023 English Language Teaching: Global Research Report, using modal verbs is one of the most important skills for sounding natural in casual English conversation. “Please” alone is not enough, the verb choice decides.

British vs. American politeness

Even among native English speakers, you can feel differences in how indirect a typical request is.

British speakers usually use more indirect wording. “I don't suppose you could...” is really a request, not a pessimistic statement. “It would be lovely if you could...” is also a request, not an evaluation. Peter Trudgill and Jean Hannah’s International English (Routledge, 2008) says British politeness norms rely heavily on indirectness and self-deprecation.

Americans are usually more direct. “Could you pass the salt?” is a straightforward request, with no upfront apology. This is not rude, the culture is different, and directness can be seen positively as openness and efficiency.

Practice with real English content

Reading polite request forms matters, but they become automatic when you hear and see them in real dialogues and in context.

With the Wordy app, you can watch English movies and series with interactive subtitles. Tap any request form and you instantly see pronunciation, formality level, and cultural notes. Comparing British and American productions helps a lot, for example a BBC series and an American sitcom can show very different request styles in the same situation.

Our guide to the best movies to learn English helps you find the best series and films for you. Learning from real dialogue works better than memorizing sentence lists, you hear intonation, speed, and which form sounds natural in each moment.